Okay, Okay

Faithful blog followers... I have been putting off the update post because I didn't know what to say or how to say it. So here's my best shot.

After a few days of testing at home with negative results I called my nurse and she had me come in for some bloodwork. Then I found out I was pregnant, my HCG (hormone that indicates pregnancy) was at a 47.1, on average for that day would be 199. So I knew it was very low. 48 hours later I did a repeat blood test and found out that my level was dropping, I was having a miscarriage. I was so upset, hurt, mad, angry, every emotion available. Even happy because I felt like God really spoke to me letting me know I COULD get pregnant, when after 2 1/2 years I wasn't sure I could.

I really wanted a plan in place but I had to wait until my period started. Luckily it started the next day (Friday May 23), and I got the okay from my doctor to go ahead and have my surgery this cycle, it would just be a little delayed.

I was so thankful my mom came out to be with me. We cleaned my house (although you can barely tell she was here now). We went shopping, spent her birthday getting pedicures and went to lunch. It was so nice to just spend some good time with her. I had my surgery Friday May 30. It was scary and again I was lucky to have Ernie and my mom there to be with me and take care of everything.

During surgery my doctor discovered that I didn't have a dilation in my tube. He said they looked great and wasn't sure what the other test meant and why it read that I was having a problem with my tubes. He also discovered I have endometerios. He cleaned it all up and he said I should be ready to go next month. I only spoke with him for about 5 minutes after the surgery in a drugged up state, my next appointment is June 16 where we will make all our plans and decide the next step is!

So all in all I've pretty much been out of work since May 22. I worked about 4 hours yesterday, and a few hours from home today. I guess I'll go in for a few hours on Thursday and Friday. Then I'm back to the grind for only 2 more weeks. Yes! I told them yesterday that June 20th would be my last day. After I've left I'll post more of the details (or you could email me) but really I need to take care of myself and my job just isn't a good fit.

Other than all this crazy fertility stuff our life is still crazy. School is over for the Summer for Ernie- he's turned in his application for dental school, and will retake the DAT on June 26th- so he's studying all the time. And Abby, she's just as cute as ever. She loved every minute of Grandma being here and took 2 days off school. Right now she is singing, "Lucy in the sky with Diamonds"- but those are the only words she knows. She has school until June 27th. Then starts Kindergarten in August! Ahh.

I guess I actually had a lot to say.